Needle sticks, and pin pricks

I know it's been a while since I've posted, things have been crazy.

Dh and I have started our injections. We received our meds a few weeks ago. The box was big. Not gargantuan, but, pretty big. We opened it up and were bewildered by all the syringes and needles and bottles, and alcohol swabs. The next day we went to talk to the nurse for our medication information session. It was scary, confusing and did I mention scary? Especially the part about an IM injection of progesterone in oil everyday for 4-8 weeks. *sigh*

We started with one little injection of estrogen everyday. No biggie really, then about a week ago or so, we added 2 more sub cue injections per day of FSH (follicle stimulating hormone) and LH (Leutinizing hormone). The first day I had to mix up all those injections and then begin injecting myself I was so stressed, then dh was being overly concerned double checking and asking lots of dosage questions. I was just stressed. It took at least 1/2 an hour to mix and prep everything, and by the time I was ready to inject myself I just started sobbing. I cried because I was just so tired. I felt like a failure, I felt like a freak, I felt like I wasn't good enough. Like I just wasn't whole enough. I wasn't supposed to be doing all that. I should just get pregnant, take my pee stick test and figure out a cute and scrappable way to tell my dh. Instead I'm shooting myself up full of hormones, going to the Dr. every other day, getting poked and stuck for blood work and having my ovaries hyperstimulated and evaluated. My dh, hugged me and told me it would be ok, and I took a deep breath and told myself "shut up and get a hold of yourself". Then I stuck myself, 3 times. Yay. It has gotten better/easier/faster. We've decided to let dh give me the injections and that way he can get used to injecting me, then maybe he can give me the IM injections. Which of course are very different from the subcue, but I think he might be able to do it. He's been doing really well with these.

The other day he accidentally stuck himself after he gave me my estrogen shot. He got all worried that he gave himself some extra estrogen. He asked me if it would do something to him. I told him "well your breasts will probably swell, but just slightly, not noticeable at all, maybe". I think he believed me for half a second. ;)