why can't it just be simple....

Ok this will be brief, I don't have time for this but I feel the nagging feeling. I need to get some anxiety out.

Why can't things be simple, like they should be. Gone for me are the days when I could just worry about classes. Make my lectures, go to class, actually have fun in class (cause my students were fun then, not insipid, gnarled hunks of cynical flesh staring back at me, mouths agape with apathy, unless the phrase extra credit appears then they are drooling yappy, begging dogs, practically peeing on themselves for extra points. Just do the work the first time around!!!) and then come back grade their exams and assignments and then go home at a reasonable hour and do it again the next day. Oooooohhhh no. Nooooo, see we have to have the overachievement going on. You know, I'm tired of the S.O. and I'm tired of being on this committee and that committee, and having meetings and then more meetings about our meetings, then we schedule a meeting to plan the committee that schedules the committees to plan more meetings. Augh, I'm pooped with the meetings and the crap.

honestly I don't want to have to pick another book, plan another event, make a presentation for some event, or coordinate other people and myself to do more things. and people keep asking, well lets do this, or lets do that. I've had all I can take of trying to coordinate crap. I'M NOT A COORDINATOR!!!! Can people be ok with that? I AM, why can't anyone else be?! I'M NOT ORGANIZED! I can sure as hell teach and I care about my students (usually, when they show that they actually care about themselves and about whether they learn or not. don't want to learn? I don't want to teach you then. Is that evil of me to say?) but I am not organized, nor am I an organizer, thats why all my friends are organizers, cause I'm not and I need someone to enable me! I'm a great HELPER. probably why I teach well, I feel like I'm helping people to understand, I like helping people learn.

Augh anyway, I'm rambled most of my agitation away, which is good. Let off some steam. I'll be trying to organize my office then off to the hobby lobby. I'm going to make myself take some time to go away for a bit. Just a few hours. If you don't make yourself leave, they'll just give you more and more reasons to stay later and later.

Thats all for now, maybe I can publish something a little less frazzled later.

-the fox